Category: Joke Board
30 Dumb Facts About Men
1. Why does a man have a clear conscience?
Because it's never used.
2. Why are men so happy?
Because ignorance is bliss.
3. Why is psychoanalysis a lot quicker for a man then for a
woman?
Because when it's time to go back to childhood, he's already
there.
4. If a man and a woman fell off a 10-story building at the same
time,who would reach the ground first?
The woman, the man would get lost.
5. How are men like commercials?
You can't believe a word either one of them says and they both
last about 60 seconds.
6. How do men exercise at the beach?
By sucking in their stomachs every time they see a woman in a
bikini.
7. What do you call a man with half a brain?
Gifted.
8. What's the difference between government bonds and men?
Bonds mature.
9. What did God say after creating man?
I can do better.
10. What are two reasons why men don't mind their own business?
1. No mind. 2. No business.
11. What do you call an intelligent man in America?
A tourist.
12. If men got pregnant ....
Psychiatric Services and serious pain killers would be available
in convenience stores and drive-through windows.
13. Did you hear about the man who won the gold medal at the
Olympics?
He had it bronzed.
14. What is gross stupidity?
144 men in one room.
15. How many men does it take to pop popcorn?
Three. One to hold the pan and two others to show off and shake
the stove.
16. How do men sort their laundry?
"Filthy" and "Filthy but Wearable."
17. Only a man would buy a $500 car and put a $4000 stereo in it.
18. What does a man consider to be quality time with his wife?
Pulling the sheets over her head and saying, "Great chili, Babe!"
19. A woman of 35 thinks of having children. What does a man of
35 think of?
Dating children.
20. What should you give a man who has everything?
A woman to show him how to work it.
21. Why do black widow spiders kill their males after mating?
To stop the snoring before it starts.
22. Why don't men have mid-life crises?
They stay stuck in adolescence.
23. How does a man show he's planning for the future?
He buys two cases of beer instead of one.
24. How is being at a singles bar different from going to the
circus?
At the circus the clowns don't talk.
25. What makes men chase women they have no intention of
marrying?
The same urge that makes dogs chase cars they have no intention
of driving.
26. What do you do with a bachelor who thinks he's God's gift?
Exchange him.
27. Why do bachelors like smart women?
Opposites attract.
28. Why are husbands like lawn mowers?
They're hard to get started, emit foul odors, and don't work half
the time.
29. What's the difference between a new husband and a new dog?
After a year, the dog is still excited to see you.
30. What is the thinnest book in the world?
What Men Know About Women.
Some of the things on this list are true, but some are just plain silly. It was a good list tough cause it made me laugh.
Yeah, pretty funny! And it's true!
jees. Somebody's a bit pecimistic in that list.
Um! Got a little bit offended.
Some of these things are funny. I think this says that men are waaaaay less complicated than women, and much more flexible.
And as for number thirty, that's the thinnest book in the world because women don't even know that much about themselves. Chicks are sooooo indecisive and that's why she can't even pick, and needs the guy to decide what restaurant to eat at when they go out, and even what to wear!
At least men aren't different people everyday.
Omg, a lot of these are so true.. lmao
I found about 1 of them true. Sorry I give men much more credit than that. I think it's slightly amusing, but not typically true.
Wow, I agree with most of the posters. Not all those are true, and a lot of stereo typing there! LOL!
Only slightly amusing, awfully stereotypical femininist stuff and, well, the title says it "dumb". I think gender stereotyping is way over used in this country.
Raaj's posts are just as stario typing and that's a different country. I think it's used way too much in general.
wow guys, it's a *joke* board. Calm down.